Monday 28 July 2008

It's too darn HOT


I stuck my finger up my nose this morning. Quite violently. I was in the shower innocently scrubbing my face, minding my own business, dreaming of having my own business more like, when wham! I jammed my finger right up my nose during an upward motion cleansing stroke. Very painful and now I have a big red mark. I think the heat is driving me to self harm. It’s a cry for help, cool breeze, tip tops, 4 weeks in the Greek isles, something – who knows!

Basically its too hot, and the weather men seem to be sending me random suggestions as per what precautions to take and whether to don my mackintosh or break out my parasol. For example yesterday the BBC said the weather in London would be heavy showers all the day long. But no, just scorching blue skies – quite Azure in fact. I even managed to get three loads of washing on that line. Now you can’t do that in a downpour.

It's been too hot at night, and I can’t sleep with the fan on, as it keeps me awake. Not that it is very noisy, but it is a distraction from sleep. It takes very little to keep me awake these days. My sleeping pattern seems to be getting worse. I’m thinking of getting some old school sleeping tablets – I’ve heard Tamazapan are very good. I think a job which one looks forward to of a morning may also aid the transition to slumber town.

Did I say it was hot. Where I work it is like being next to a motorway, but the only way to stay at all alive in this inferno is to have the windows open and the fan on. This causes but a stir of the air, but is a little better than nothing. You can’t hear yourself think though or the person next to you speaking aloud, but there is a little breeze. The other downside, apart from the sirens and the constant motorway level rumble, is you can hear the populous going about their dailies. I think the heat is getting to them as well. I witnessed one woman today screaming at her child so very loudly. I think it wasn’t standing still or some other heinous crime, although the thump she gave it made me think it must have just committed a gun related crime or have been trafficking narcotics. I said to her ‘that’s nice’ in a very unhelpful middle class way. I suppose the best thing would have been to offer her parenting lessons. I do love to help, I’m sure she’d have taken it well.

The weather also infringes on taste and decency fashion wise. Hot you see, makes all sorts leave the house in all sorts. It’s like dress down Friday gone mad. Normally quiet inoffensive slightly nerdy people seem to come alive and attend donning some sort of Alan Whicker styllee get up. Where do they get these outfits from, and what gene based trigger kick starts the process of outfit choice. I think it must work along the same lines as my other 'it is too darn hot' bete noire – which is those frigging flying ants – nasty, where did they come from, where did they go to buggers!

Did I mention old people wearing shorts? Well its too hot to remember everything I suppose. Maybe that is a heat wave moan too far. Let’s just say having seen the first aider at work in shorts today, I have placed a ‘do not resuscitate’ sign on my desk chair. Like a living will – it avoids any confusion.
All the best - keep cool.

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