It’s been a busy few days, I am practically strangers with my sofa, but there seems to have been so much to do. However I don’t know how I get anything done at the moment what with it being night time from about 4pm in the afternoon.
Here are some notes from the last two weeks, and I offer them by way of a chronicle for your amusement and interest.
TOO TIRED TO WORK, TOO YOUNG TO RETIRE
I seem to be too tired to think today. I have reached brain overload, and achievement burn out. It is only Thursday but I feel like I've squeezed two weeks’ worth of work into 4 days. It is only 5 pm but it feels like midnight. It has been a very busy week, and these early dark evenings don't help, but I think that perhaps the truth is that I am now too old to work and should be given early retirement and or 25 years gardening leave. At least that would mean that the grass would finally get cut, and the gates painted. I have started to obsess a little recently about the spine tingling horror, knowing that early retirement is at least 15 years away and probably more like 20 years away, induces! To think I'm going to have to work for as long as I've already been working is a concept too far. There's always marrying up, but I'm very happy on my own at the moment. There's a lottery win, but that requires guessing the correct numbers - harder than it sounds. So I don't know, but I am reviewing my options and hope to have my master plan fully functioning and risk assessed sometime within the next 10 years. I can't begin to think how tired I'll feel by the time I'm 65.
LEAVE THE BOTTLE
Thursday saw Robbyn and I going to a wonderful wine tasting class, yes I know, horse, stable door etc, but it was excellent. We had to do, swirling round the glass, smelling and some ‘yes I’m definitely getting some driving gloves here, and maybe a spot of roasted duck’ we did swilling round the mouth and gauging how the wine worked on different taste buds, we did holding the wine in the bottom of our mouths whilst drawing air in to make sure all our receptors got a good blast. Absolutely wonderful.
EVERYONE NEEDS GOOD NEIGHBOURS
I met one of my neighbours last night. He came round to share some sad news about another neighbour who has been taken unwell, perhaps terminally. Now my elderly neighbour, who is ill, I have known her for the 10 years I've been in my flat, and we chat and share the time of day and swap ailment stories etc, like a pair of gooduns. But this man who came round I didn't know him from Adam. I said 'have you just moved in next door?' he said' No I've lived there for 10 years' How can someone have lived next door to me for ten years and I didn't know, let alone have never said hello and introduced myself. I felt very bad about that, so shook his hand extra sincerely and told him to keep me posted, and let me know if there was anything I could do to help.
Sadly my neighbour died a couple of days later – end of a mini era for me and very sad.
LIKE OLD FRIENDS DO
I got a wonderful message from a blast from the past, someone who I haven’t seen for at least 10 years. Anyway when I first met ‘Alice’ he was just 19 and now he is 30, which made me feel terribly old myself. He came round and it was wonderful to catch up, laugh about the past, remember silly things from long ago, and to hear how lives have moved on, grown and the ups and downs of in between. So my top life advice today is say hello to someone you haven’t said hello to for years and spend a bit of time laughing and catching up.
I had a long and intense sms extravaganza with Adrian mid week; let’s just say he’s not overly happy with my stain control, laundry temperature and general adherence to strict, but basic principles. He’s put me down for retraining. Hotter, longer, stronger, more powder! No it’s not an 80’s porn remake it’s a way of life!
COSTA RICAN TRAGEDY
Well all I can say is what a week for me to return to the Archies. Who would have thought that a radio drama based around people saying things like......
‘Have you seen Shula?’
‘You mean Kenton’s sister? No sorry, why?’
‘Oh it’s just that Ian..’
‘Adam’s civil partner?’
‘Yes, it’s just that Ian wanted to ask her where Susan was’
‘Why, is it about the lambing?’
‘No it’s just he wants to crush her skull and burn down the fucking shop so she stops her incessant whining!’
.......could be so wonderful and so compelling. Have another large gin and tonic tiger, that’s all I have to say on the matter.
MAKING ALCOHOLISM ACCEPTABLE
I wondered this morning at about 10.30 whether it was too early to have a cocktail. I called my Sommelier immediately and she said yes, unless you added tomato juice to it and called it a bloody Mary. Then it’s all kosher and guardian reader and even children can have them.
AND THE WINNER IS....
So on Wednesday night I rehashed one of my old roles, no not Diamante Alas, but rather as international master of ceremonies and glamorous compére for the world renowned Community Education Student Awards ceremony. It is a very popular evening, a little more Argos than BAFTA perhaps, with some church heating fund jumble thrown in for good measure, but it went mostly smoothly. I announced student after student and stumbled through some very tricky surnames, but we all got there in the end and everyone had a fantastic evening. Apparently in the event feedback, some people had commented on how good the Compére had been. It actually said Compeer though.
WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE
Well that’s me; I’m just splashing a bit of bleach around now a bit like a priest with the holy water at the blessing of the boats. I’m also roasting some almonds, and then before I go to see the gurlz and my goddaughter I'll try and pen down some ideas for my new rock opera/concept album.