Saturday, 7 July 2007

Do You Have This in a Medium?

Does he have dark hair?

"la fenĂȘtre!" "Ladies and Gentlemen - she knows no French!"

Do you remember David Icke? He was a footballer then a BBC presenter who went on to develop crack pot conspiracy theories, ideas on Prince Phillip being a reptile (possibly true) god twisting alien astonishments etc.. Importantly though he had a mullet and regularly wore a shell suit.

But the question on everybody's lips is where is he now? Well fret not dear reader, for I have found him, or rather Jo, Anne and Evie have found him.

As citizens of the world, conscious of their carbon footprint (obligatory nod to Live Earth Day - "Allo Hamburg") and big fans of Michael Palin, they oft travel by train. On one of their recent journeys Jo called me 'du train' to make some final arrangements to our hectic social life. When she had completed the call and hung up, that's when it happened.

"Does he have dark hair? I can see the letters USA - He's changing his job and moving to America"

The mouthy stranger opposite had mousy brown hair, a pinkish complexion, and was wearing a shell suit! [to Jo] "You're wearing pink, because you need to look after yourself more" Well I know she's got a glowing aura, which will always attract, but I think that's a bit rich - it's one thing if silver has passed over a palm, but to a stranger?

He saw Evie travelling, he saw her in Italy, and she's going to be a Physicist. Well that's the pension sorted at least. He didn't say anything about Anne. Maybe this was because her aura wasn't in focus that day or could it have been the 'mess with my aura and I'll have your crystal balls for table decorations' look. I wonder?

He let them know that he sees the future and has always worked in a bank, Little Madeleine would be alright he noted. One wonders why if he could see the future he hadn't made a more lucrative career with the gee gees, or through acting as a consultant to world governments. He's planning on retiring to Spain though, so I suppose that's something nice to look forward to.

So there you have it -I'm off! When in the USA I shall probably be starring in the sex and the city movie as Chris North's younger and far more handsome brother. They haven't quite come up with the name of my character yet, but I think it will no doubt be something like Chip, Brett or Hank. Well as you all know I've never had any problem getting my Mabel to the back of the auditorium, so it's no surprise Hollywood called, only a suprise that it wasn't sooner.

So watch this space. I have to change my name though. Adrian tells me it's a numbers game out there. So from now on my adopted monika will be William Harold Godwin III.

All the best from the West.


From the News Shopper

1 comment:

Turning Into My Dad said...

as a boy broadcaster, one of my duties was to dust the dandruff of D Icke's shoulders, moments before he `'went live" with the South Today sports news. He lived on the Isle of Wight - where was Jo and Anne's train going? We should be told.

And Jo was a always a big fan of South Today - spooky...